Monday, January 9, 2017
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
I think my subconscious broke up with me.
There i was. On a date with this girl for the first time. It felt so great. She felt like every thing i had ever wanted. she was very kind, sensitive and beautiful. We talked a bit and cuddled some, and then we drove to a big city to go to this antiques show.
While we drove we talked and laughed. it was incredible. We looked at the leaves that were all sorts of different colors as we drove through the canyon. It was beautiful and blissful. Once we arrived at the building where the antique show was we found a place in the room to watch the appraisals of these valuables take place one by one. Every one in the room was so excited as they waited in anticipation to hear if their keepsake was worth monetary value as well as sentimental value. This girl and I kept laughing and joking having a great time all the way throughout.
Once we were well into the night something went terribly wrong. In the middle of one of these appraisals this man in a costume broke into the room and started shooting the place up and ruining these peoples antiques. He held all of us hostage with no particular reason. We waited for someone to come but nothing ever came. I don't recall exactly how it happened, but during the course of this traumatic experience this girl and I were separated. eventually, after a long period of fear and trauma, the situation was resolved and i went to go find this girl.
I found her in a room with a few other people, sitting on a chair crying. seeing as i had felt such a deep connection and had an amazing time that night I went over to try and comfort her. I went and sat down by her for a second before she said, in a very suprised and disappointed tone of voice, " You shot someone." I had no recollection of this happening. I tried to explain that everything i did was for the safety her safety, and the safety of the whole group, but all she said was, "i'm sorry, I don't feel like i can talk to you." I was devistated. This girl that i had fallen head over heels for wouldn't even talk to me. As she walked out the door in tears with someone else, looking at me in a very disappointed way, my heart dropped. I felt like the scum of the earth, and to make it all worse it was because i had tried to save everyone, including her.
It was at this point that i woke up. It was a dream, but it felt so real. I woke up feeling like i'd loved and lost. I literally woke up sad and depressed like the morning after a break up. Isn't it amazing how our brain so capable of implanting so many emotions even in the absence of experience.
I think i'll take this dream to mean that i'll be single for a good while. I'll just keep chugging along with school work until I find that girl that will make me feel so happy, worthwhile, and complete; just in time for her to break my heart.
While we drove we talked and laughed. it was incredible. We looked at the leaves that were all sorts of different colors as we drove through the canyon. It was beautiful and blissful. Once we arrived at the building where the antique show was we found a place in the room to watch the appraisals of these valuables take place one by one. Every one in the room was so excited as they waited in anticipation to hear if their keepsake was worth monetary value as well as sentimental value. This girl and I kept laughing and joking having a great time all the way throughout.
Once we were well into the night something went terribly wrong. In the middle of one of these appraisals this man in a costume broke into the room and started shooting the place up and ruining these peoples antiques. He held all of us hostage with no particular reason. We waited for someone to come but nothing ever came. I don't recall exactly how it happened, but during the course of this traumatic experience this girl and I were separated. eventually, after a long period of fear and trauma, the situation was resolved and i went to go find this girl.
I found her in a room with a few other people, sitting on a chair crying. seeing as i had felt such a deep connection and had an amazing time that night I went over to try and comfort her. I went and sat down by her for a second before she said, in a very suprised and disappointed tone of voice, " You shot someone." I had no recollection of this happening. I tried to explain that everything i did was for the safety her safety, and the safety of the whole group, but all she said was, "i'm sorry, I don't feel like i can talk to you." I was devistated. This girl that i had fallen head over heels for wouldn't even talk to me. As she walked out the door in tears with someone else, looking at me in a very disappointed way, my heart dropped. I felt like the scum of the earth, and to make it all worse it was because i had tried to save everyone, including her.
It was at this point that i woke up. It was a dream, but it felt so real. I woke up feeling like i'd loved and lost. I literally woke up sad and depressed like the morning after a break up. Isn't it amazing how our brain so capable of implanting so many emotions even in the absence of experience.
I think i'll take this dream to mean that i'll be single for a good while. I'll just keep chugging along with school work until I find that girl that will make me feel so happy, worthwhile, and complete; just in time for her to break my heart.
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
Here's to you random Russian lady!
I have a random russian follower that i'm not sure if i know. If i know you than good! remind me how i know you... if i don't than. Hey! this one's for you!
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